Saturday, December 18, 2010
Post #170:Here and nowMy heart aches. It aches terribly, sadness and regret floods my heart. And sometimes, I can't help but ask WHY? Why is this happening? What can I do? Where is God? When will He come?And even as I listen to this song, I know that God is here, right here, right now. And all that I ever need, all that my searching heart has longed for can be found, 'cause God is here in this moment, here and now.I know that God is in control. He is in control of every circumstance in our lives, everything that we cannot do, God can. For with God, nothing is impossible!And I guess I just have perhaps, no choice, but to trust Him. Trust that God is leading me into His perfect plan, and that He is always in control. And if God can come down on Earth to die for our sins, how much more does He not love us enough to work for the best of us?And even as I feel that God is so far away, perhaps this is a test from God. But whatever it is, right now, God is here. And let the presence of the Lord fill my heart once more, as I thirst and hunger for the floodgates of heaven to open. How we need the river.I need to be transformed.I want to be productive, I want to be a good friend, I want to make a difference, I want to touch the lives of others. I want to be a sanctuary, a shelter for those who are lost and weary...I want to serve again.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Post #169:Don't mind me blowing my own horn or anything, but I just wanted to list some achievements I had over the years. If I have any that I missed out, please do inform me! I shall not add lame stuff like New South Wales because I've got too many of those. And pretty much anyone and everyone can get Distinction or High Distinction.Primary School:Singapore Youth Festival (SYF) Bronze - 2002Singapore Youth Festival (SYF) Silver - 2004COLOURS (Service) Award - 2004Best Improvement Award - 2004Rosyth Games Day Table Tennis 2nd Position - 2005Singapore Mathematical Olympiad for Primary School (SMOPS) Gold - 2005SMOPS Platinum - 2006Singapore Youth Festival (SYF) Silver - 2006Rosyth Concert Band Asst Band Major - 2004-2006Rosyth Concert Band Saxophone Section Leader - 2006 (forgot year that I started)Rosyth AMEC Vice-chairman (i think) - 2006Prefectorial Board - 2004-2006Secondary School:Singapore Mathematical Olympiad (Junior) Gold - 2007Singapore Mathematical Olympiad (Junior) Silver - 2008Australian Mathematical Competition Prize - 2008MOE Lower-Secondary Programming Competition Silver - 2008House Carnival (Badminton) 3rd Position - 2008Singapore International Band Festival (SIBF) Silver - 2008SYF Silver - 2009Top in Level for Physics - 2009Top in Level for Computer Elective Programme - 2009Silver Award for RE Congress - 2009SIBF Gold - 2010CCA Service Award (RIMB) - 2010CCA Merit Award (Infocomm Club) - 2010EAGLES Award for Achievement, Good Leadership and Service - 20101st Prize in Torrance Legacy Creative Writing Competition - 2010Merit Award for Greenwave Competition - 2010Merit Award for National Software Competition (Algorithm) - 2010Silver Award for National Olympiad in Informatics - 2010Bronze Award for Asia-Pacific Informatics Olympiad - 2010Singapore Junior Physics Olympiad Honourable Mention -2010Top in Level for Physics (yet to receive award) - 2010Top in Level for Computer Elective Programme (yet to receive award) - 2010StrITWise 3rd Position - 2010Bayley Extended EXCO - 2009RIMB Saxes and Lower Woodwinds Section Leader - 2010RIMB Band Major (CCAL) - 2010Infocomm Club Vice-chairman (Programming) - 2010RInformatics2010 Trainer - 2010 (lol just wanted to add this!)Prefectorial Board - 2009-2010Hmmm any I missed out?Anyway, this got me really thinking on a few things.1) Have I been taking things for granted?I mean I am blessed with so much, I am blessed with good grades and good achievements. I am blessed with so much talent and such an amazing brain, am I wasting them away? For I have been moodless and unproductive, I need to get out of my depressive mood and learn to press on and persevere! I need to be more self-aware and have full mastery and control over my feelings, instead of letting my feelings control me and who I am. No, no more shall my feelings of boredom or loneliness or sadness flood my heart. I WILL RISE UP.But I realized, to even get to such a height, I am truly blessed with so much support from the people around me who trusts me so much, am I letting all of them down? Am I treating them terribly? Have I been so selfish, or am I giving them back the respect and the gratitude that they so rightfully deserve. Perhaps they, deserve all these achievements, much more than I do.2) Are all these even important?From Vincent's SOL 2 class that I crashed, I've learnt that CS Lewis said: "The salvation of a single soul is more important than the production or preservation of all the epics and tragedies in the world." And surely, the production or perservation of all the epics and tragedies in the world is far greater than all my talent and achievements.And so it set me thinking: Definitely, without doubt, the salvation of a single soul is more important than all these achievements put together. What is my priority? Am I working so hard for all these achievements that I am forgetting my Mission when in fact all these achievements should just come naturally as I long to glory God? What is the focus of my life?
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Post #168:The power of the Holy Spirit is so great.Today, I went to our church's Teens IDOL Camp at Northbrooks Secondary School (Yishun there), not as a participant but as an invited testimony sharer. Well, one of the SOL2 sessions was about sharing personal testimony, and my testimony was supposed to be a "model" for the class (or a learning point). But while my five minutes of fame was at 1+, I arrived at 10:45 and attended the previous session that Vincent was doing. And I was greatly blessed by the "Evangelism" session.The Holy Spirit was amongst us and during the prayer time, suddenly there was this guy who was just walking normally (back to his place I think), and then all of a sudden the Holy Spirit came on him and he just dropped and collapsed halfway while walking on the floor. He hit his head against the cupboard, and I quickly go pull him away from the cupboard.I've heard of the power of the Holy Spirit during Encounter Camp and how people will just drop or start laughing uncontrollably (even the pastors) but I never really seen it myself. And I never expected it to happen in the SOL2 session but God does wonders!But anyway during the next session, I went up to give testimony. Introduced myself, RI, 16 years old, baptised by Vincent 2 days ago (LOL), chairman of band, vice-chair of infocomm and prefect, and then I started giving my testimony speech (if I continued on they would be hungrier and blame me)So then after my testimony speech, if you want to hear it I can tell you (:, Vincent asks for good points and area of improvements. And they were so nice, they barely dare say any area of improvements for me. Haha but then Vincent said I gave an A* testimony and that was great I suppose xD At the end of the session, Vincent also went up to me and told the class about my prayer-email and prayergroup since Sec 1, so I hope (or rather I think) that the class was pretty inspired. What a nice impression I gave!But I guess one thing I've taken away from the whole session is the call of God, not as a pleasure boat but really as a life-saving boat. As Vincent shared about how his father had a dream about his mother being in a very dark oppressive place, I even sense that God is putting in my heart that vision for the lost. How badly do I want to bring them to God and eternal life?Am I enjoying the pleasure boat?
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Post #167:Many a times in our lives we search for this beauty, but in this search we don't understand that in this world, it is really not a lack of beauty but a lack of discovery. Sometimes we take the best things around us for granted and we never really appreciate it until it has been stripped away from us. Perhaps it's our wealth, perhaps our grades, or perhaps it's our relationships.Look at the people around you. As humans, we tend to like some people better than others: that's perfectly normal. And sometimes we focus on deepening our relationship with the people we like, that we fail to see the greatest friends around you may just be those whom you don't "like the best".But so what? They are the real friends. They stand by you when you need them. And while you may not have a special feeling for them, while you may not long to deepen your relationship with them as much, have you been neglecting these real friends? I don't know about you, but as for me, I would rather a true friend than a fake friend that I just like.Because these true friends are those who really care for you rather than for themselves, they put your interests in their heart and they are truly beautiful in heart. Perhaps in your world, it's not a lack of true friends, but a lack of discovery of them. And one day, as these friends get pushed aside once again, perhaps a loyal friend lost may be one of your biggest regrets. Or will it even bother you? Do you care enough?The simplest act of treasuring someone and making them feel special can just be the river to a dry and barren heart, longing and thirsting for water. If you have felt that weariness lifted from your hearts before, then freely bless it upon to others as well. For this dog waits outside this jail cell for the master; this seed stays in dry ground thirsting for the rain to come - but only you would know the answer to the question I'm afraid of knowing the answer to: will it come?A thousand stars shine in your night sky, and I am but just one in a million. Perhaps nothing special, but I try to shine as brightly as I can to light up your paths and to provide warmth during the cold stormy night. Will you notice me? Or will I just be part of the everyday scenery, being taken for granted and expected to shine for you. If I burn out, will you not still gaze into your telescope to look for other stars?In the deep recesses of my mind I secretly desire for your night to be dark so you would notice my light. For who notices the lit candle when it is day? No, it is only appreciated when dusk befalls on the land. I want to shine for you, but I cannot shine any brighter with the desolate and bare core. Is it meant to be this way?Give me strength to stand in this dry and weary land. Oh how we need the river, how we need the rain. I need this strength to shine, and this living water I cannot expect from you for you cannot provide. I must look up to the hills, fall on my knees and cry out for the Lord Almighty to shower down His glory and grace and may His Holy Presence fill my heart.For freely I have received of His great love, freely I shall give. Where does my strength come from? My strength comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and Earth. It is impossible for me to love without being reciprocated, but even when we did not love God, He sent Jesus to die for our sins. And if we are called to be Sons of God, we must learn from the greatest love of all and we must manifest it in our daily lives.And so I need to change my source of strength.Draw me deeper, once more I cry out, draw me deeper.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Post #166:What am I trying to do?To be continued.
Leave a tag too!
Name: Joseph Lee
Age: 16 years old
Date of Birth: June 18 1994
School:Raffles Institution
Class:1P, 2P, 3I, 4I
CCA:RIMB, Infocomm Club
Thanks to all the blogs i referred to(countless) for html code help :) (esp.cyn'and sixseven)
Adobe Photoshop Elements for supernatural abilities
